The first year of parenthood forever changes you. Having some ideas on how to navigate things you will inevitably come up against as a brand-new parent can make the transition smoother.
\n \nHere are my top five pieces of advice to help you thrive:
\nMental health must be planned for and nurtured.
\nLet’s make it normal to talk about the mental health strain of becoming a new parent. Many struggle with big feelings, emotions, overwhelm, and exhaustion, and are often unprepared and unaware of resources to help them.
\nConnecting with a mental health professional proactively can be a great plan to create a strategy of healthy behaviors and activities to effectively handle all on your plate with a newborn baby. These visits can also show you what to watch out for in yourself and in your partner and also provide a list of resources in case they are needed. If you prioritize your mental health during this time, you can fortify yourselves for a more solid start to your parenting journey.
\nBabies rely on us completely. Of course, on the surface we know this. However, the reality of what this looks and feels like can be quite surprising when we are living it day-to-day. It seems that there is always something that we need to be doing for our baby. It is demanding, tiring, and overwhelming.
\nManaging our time, our support system, and our household structure can help us significantly. The more organized you can be in advance, the less stress you will generally experience. It is also important to manage your expectations. Learning your new baby and attending to their every need may be basic, but it is not simple or easy. Your work is still busy and exhausting. Be kind to yourself. Be aware of the incredibly important job you are doing.
\nSleep is imperative. It is true, your sleep will be compromised after you have a baby. However, do not underestimate the effects of a lack of sleep. When we don’t get enough rest, it affects our decision-making skills, our patience, our ability to effectively communicate, and, eventually, it can become a matter of safety. Seeking solutions to help you get more rest is vital to your well-being. Effective scheduling with your partner, getting help and support from family and friends, and possibly hiring a postpartum doula are all ways you can help your sleep needs after having a new baby.
\nIt takes a village. Although it is important to take time in the first several weeks to recover from delivery, it is imperative that you eventually find ways to utilize your village of support and resources to have a happy and healthy time with your new baby. Sometimes, we can feel so overwhelmed with being a new parent that we exhaustedly isolate ourselves from the outside world. Try to resist this temptation and find ways to connect with other new parents, perhaps through a new parents’ group that you can attend regularly. You can even interact with friends, share your experiences, and normalize what you are going through. Connect with wellness practitioners to help you feel healthy and strong, such as massage therapy, acupuncture, pelvic floor physiotherapy, traditional physiotherapy, chiropractic care, and, as mentioned above, psychological support. Don’t be shy to ask for help when needed. Utilize those around you to help you stay as healthy and happy as possible so you can take the time to enjoy the special moments with your little one.
\nGet outside and move. Getting out of the house and into the fresh air and sunshine is mood-elevating, energy-lifting, and just feels good. This suggestion will benefit your mental and physical health in so many ways. It doesn't matter the activity – whether it's less structured, like taking baby for a walk around the block or going to a fitness program or group, just do it! You will feel so much better once you are out and moving, and it's beneficial to your little one, too.
\nSelf-care cannot be neglected. It is so easy to forget about you when you are so busy with baby. Some days you feel you couldn’t possibly have time to do something for yourself. However, if you lose yourself in the process of being a parent, it will take a toll on your mental and physical well-being. Take time for yourself when you can; you can’t pour from an empty cup. You must take care of yourself so you can be the most effective caretaker for your baby. If you do, this will allow you to be the best version of yourself for both you and everyone around you, which is what we always want. Invest in yourself. You are worthy. Always!
\nThe journey of being a brand-new parent is hard but can be so rewarding if we take proper steps to prepare and manage effectively, so that we can truly enjoy our time with our precious newborn. Take the time to do some of these steps to help you have a happier, smoother, and more positive transition.
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Sharon Loose, CCE, CD, BDT, PCD, is a certified doula and childbirth educator with 26 years of experience and has supported over 2,000 Calgary and area families on their parenthood journey. She is also the owner of Calgary Birth Essentials, which offers private and small group prenatal classes, birth and postpartum doula support, and breastfeeding and early parenting education. For more information visit calgarybirthessentials.com.
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