Helping kids make friends at camp: Social skills tips for building connections and confidence

Written by: Chantal Côté, MC, R. Psych

Summer camp can be an exciting adventure, but for many older children and teens, it can also come with a wave of worries:

“What if nobody likes me?”

“How do I get to know people?”

“I’m too nervous… too shy…”

These fears are normal, but they don’t have to hold your child back. If your child says no to camp, they might be expressing a fear or hesitation. This is an opportunity to get curious about what’s underneath that “no.” That way, you can help them feel more confident and connected before they even step foot at camp.

1. Start with their interests. One of the best ways to help a child feel at ease in a new environment is to choose something that aligns with their interests. Do they love art? Running around outside? Acting out dramatic scenes? Finding a summer camp that matches their natural interests – while also introducing new skills – can set them up for success. Shared interests naturally create connection points with others, making it easier for friendships to form.

2. Have a confidence-boosting conversation before camp. Before camp even starts, a few intentional conversations can help your child feel more confident about making friends. Let them know that some of the other kids will share similar interests and are also likely feeling a little nervous about meeting new people. You can also help them reframe their mindset by asking a different question. Instead of thinking, “Will I fit in?” they can ask, “Who might I have something in common with?” Just this small shift in perspective can ease some anxiety and create a sense of curiosity over fear.

3. Do a “mini vision session.” A powerful way to build confidence is to help your child or teen visualize their camp experience by going all the way to the end of the week in their mind and imagining:

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• What would make this camp experience great?
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• What would I love to do?
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• What can challenge me in a new and exciting way?
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• How do I want to feel at the end of camp?
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I once worked with a teen who told me their only goal for summer camp was to go through a water obstacle course they had avoided years prior. They came back beaming with confidence – not only had they conquered their challenge, but they also made new friends along the way.

By visualizing what they want to experience at camp, kids set an intention and activate a sense of excitement and possibility.

4. Teach the basics of starting a conversation. Making friends is a skill, and like any skill, it can be practiced. Some children might naturally pick up on social cues with ease, while others may benefit from direct guidance on how to start a conversation.

A simple framework can be:

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• Say hello in some way (e.g. hi, wave, hey)
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• Give a genuine compliment (e.g. “I love your drawing!”)
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• Ask an open-ended question (e.g. “What sports do you play?”)
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These small actions open the door to connection and help kids feel more at ease in social settings.

5. Confidence comes from acts of bravery. Confidence isn’t something we’re born with – it’s built through consistent, repeated acts of bravery. Saying hi to someone new, trying a new activity, or even signing up for camp in the first place are all acts of courage. The more children practice stepping outside their comfort zone, the easier it becomes.

In our THP (The Happiness Path) program for confidence, resilience, and community-building, teens often say that even when something challenges them, pushing through the discomfort is always worth it – and the same is true for summer camp!

6. Focus on having fun. When your child can focus on having fun rather than feeling the pressure to make friends, social connections tend to happen naturally. When they’re engaged in activities they enjoy, it’s easier to smile at the person next to them, ask a question, or join a group.

If they’re nervous, you can remind them: think of camp as an experiment. Try things out. See what happens. Worst case? You don’t love it. Best case? You have an amazing time and meet some great people.

7. What encouraging camp is all about. Helping your child prepare for camp isn’t about removing all their worries – it’s about acknowledging the natural thoughts that can arise and offering tools and mindset ideas to navigate social situations with confidence. With a little preparation, encouragement, and practice, they’ll be well on their way to building meaningful friendships and making unforgettable summer memories.

Chantal is a teen life coach and psychologist and the founder of Pyramid Psychology, a Calgary-based business dedicated to helping teen girls build confidence, resilience, and emotional well-being through coaching, therapy, and group programs. To learn more about her mission to support 100,000 teen girls in developing strong mindsets and self-acceptance visit pyramidpsychology.com/about-us.

See our related articles:

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• Breaking out of their shell: Nurturing your shy child's camp experience
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• Myths and facts about camp
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• Self-Determination at Summer Camp
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